Chapter 1 Page 80

February 28th, 2008, 6:23 pm

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Reply tRickityHouses, February 28th, 2008, 6:24 pm

YAY I FINISHED A CHAPTER!!!!

*breaks open champange bottle

I hope you enjoyed it so far. I'm going to take a tiny break to change some things like add a few pages that need to be there or to edit some things, nothing too drastic.

Also any suggestions for filler in between this chapter and the next? I have a few ideas but more wont hurt.

and finally what do you guys like so far? what do you want to see more of and seriously what do you think?

ANYWAYS THANKS AND ENJOY.

Reply Sol, February 28th, 2008, 6:34 pm

That has to be one of the longest Chapters I've ever seen. Most would have broken that into multiple chapters. But congrats on finishing Chapter 1!

Overall, I like the story, but I got a little confused about how Max suddenly changed into that Demon thing.

Reply tRickityHouses, February 28th, 2008, 6:42 pm

Yeah thats one on the things I'm going back to. Gunna delete page 63 cause it makes no sense. That whole changing thing is secretive for now... But I plan to not to use it like a power up crutch like naruto's fox tail demon.

Its still sorta up in the air though. Anyways glad you enjoyed the story.

Reply daidaishar, February 28th, 2008, 8:41 pm

nice way to end the chapter, all of the lighting effects on the page are incredible, especially on the clouds.

I agree with Sol in that the transformation was confusing simply in its abruptness I guess, but other than that the chapter's been great.

Reply JiminycricketX, February 28th, 2008, 9:00 pm

Cool Beans. I love the way you color.

I think what I've liked the most are your battle scenes. Calling them really freaking epic would be an understatement. Keep up the great work.

Reply TehArtMonkee, February 29th, 2008, 11:05 am

'Grats! *Grabs champagne bottle and glass, helping herself*
Whoot! You're onto your next chapter <3
*takes time out to glomp uber emo looking Max in page above*
Awww....Can't wait to see what happens to him!
*Commences Fangirling....^w^ It's not so bad once you get used to it*

Reply Zhai, February 29th, 2008, 12:59 pm

I loved it! Really really really really cool action scenes, nice dialogue, loved it all^^
Onto the next chapter!Yay!!!

Oh hey! I want some champagne too^^

Reply omniblade, February 29th, 2008, 5:34 pm

First of all, that was the FIRST CHAPTER! I always thought it was broken up with the color pages. Oh well.

Honestly, I have idea for fillers. You could always use the "creature" profile as one.have its eye's pierce through the dark with its hands stained with the life of its victim.

So far I like the fact that you are trying to be realistic in terms of relationships and warfare. Not everyone who is important lives on, and may actually die off quickly. Also I like that fact that you try to make the characters seem human, as in they seem to be feeling what is going on. However at times (for me anyway) it seemed hard to tell what is going on (when Louis died, still makes me sad). So I suppose transition could be slightly improved but thats pretty much it.

For what I want to see more... I really want to see the behind the scene moments with the government officials and that one masked tiki guy. The demon transformation would also be nice. Last I would really like to see what happened to Max. It somewhat confused me. It seemed like Max was taken to the hospital but later was shown to be back in the cave (or was that a flash back..)

You could actually have the guy confort his inner demon spiritually, but thats probably too cliche and doesnt fit your style.

So far I really like it. This is one of the few comics that I really pay attention to. So grab a drink and get merry, for you deserve every last gulp.

Reply xenon, February 29th, 2008, 5:47 pm

Cool, you always do great lighting effects!

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